The Cashier

Kathleen, a middle aged woman with blue eyes and a huge smile tells me how much fun her family had playing games on Christmas. Then she shares how during these times she misses her mother. “Whenever my sisters and I find a penny we say our mother is with us.” As she tells me this, a penny lies close to where I stand. I pick it up and give it to her. “Oh, my God. I need to call my sisters.” You could tell she was deeply touched by the “coincidence” of the proximity of where the penny laid, our conversation and the timing of its presence. “As I get older, I realize how we need to keep an open heart and be aware of all of the signs around us.” When people like Kathleen share their personal stories with me, I am moved by their willingness to be so vulnerable. I feel she can teach me a lot about resilience to daily challenges. The Universe provides the beauty, we just have to look.

Sometimes for these early 6:30 morning shifts I have to dig a little deeper and ask for some strength to help me. I sit in the car before my shift and ask God for a little more physical strength today. Julia, one of my first customers with a huge smile and the kindest eyes; “Will you say a prayer with me? It just feels right...” Grasping both my hands she asked the Holy Father for assistance on our journey and strength in the New Year.  This prayer lasted a good 20 seconds. Ask and you shall receive. As she turned to leave she asked for a hug; we both had tears in our eyes. Such a simple, kind gesture on Christmas Eve. The next couple in line, Yohanne and Dinette were so touched with what they saw that they shared their own spiritual experience and the kindness and gentleness they see all around them. They told me of the church they go to and the impact it has had on their lives. “What a wonderful way to start our day and a blessing on this holiday.” Genuine, kind people who ha...

“Do you believe in God?” I am asked by a polished gentleman; trim, muscular and dressed in tailored clothes. He tells me of his boyhood dreams to be a baseball player which was derailed by injury to his rotator cuff. “Now, I am figuring out my pathway. Maybe reaching out to struggling kids with a similar dream to my own. I feel the need to be of service so I ask God where do you want me now.” I admire the smile and charisma he feels and not being derailed by life. As we talk the manager passes several times, maybe concerned with the amount of time I am spending with the customer. It's funny how life works because at that same moment the gentleman behind apologizes for groceries he has missed and needs to run out of line to get them. His delay provides me with added time to share with my new friend. A straight Path is seldom what the Universe provides. The twists and turns of our Journey will provide the strength we so desire for growth and a peaceful well-being.

Mel tells me he owns a sneaker store in Japan which brings in shoes from all over the world. “You and I are the same. We are providing a Light for people's lives.” He tells me the Joy it gives him to help people and the possibilities our Universe provides. “I am truly blessed to be doing what I love in a meaningful way.” Mel enjoys his visits back to America where he can join his parents for the holidays. Conversation is easy, as I tell him I have relatives who work in Japan. Connections quickly emerge as he tells me his store is directly across from The Ritz where my brother-in-law is working. It seems like the more people I meet, the more inspired I feel by the goodness that surrounds us. The beauty we see outside is really an emanation of the beauty within

Roosevelt is a trained electrician but was injured on the job. “God gave me the break that I needed to follow my dream to be a truck driver. I didn’t always follow God but my mom had health scares and taught me to be grateful. Now I am here 15 miles out of my way not knowing why I traveled this far until I met you.” We both thanked each other for the connection…appreciative of kind, good souls. _____________________________________________________________________________________ Tuesday, December 17, 2024-Mother pushing cart with exuberant little girl jumping as she walked. “I love bunnies! I met Santa and got a purple yoyo that lights up.” Xalana continued to tell me about her life while her mom quietly observed with a smile. “I needed that. It has been a really rough morning with her biological mom, thank you.” The lady explains that she is the foster mom and is trying to bring some hope and positivity to this little girl's life. Watching their interactions, it is clear “the mom”...

Cashiering can be a little physically demanding, so I asked my manager if I can be trained in self-checkout. Andres, a college student, was quick to help me learn the proper procedures. He recognized people having conversations with me and questioned how I was making the connections. “It seems so easy for you. “I tend to be on my own. I joined a fraternity to see if close interactions would help with my confidence. It worked with my friend. He became a whole different person. I am jealous.” He goes on to tell me that he is studying computer science but has lost the passion. “I really don’t have the excitement that I used to have. I am not really sure of my direction but I know I want to better myself; maybe I will start journaling or play the guitar that has been sitting in my room.” A sincere young man who is unsure of his path. You feel how hard he is on himself. This journey of life can be difficult but you get the feeling that his kindness and warmth will lead him into...

With my intention to share kindness and compassion while doing my cashiering, I am experiencing goodness beyond the grocery store. Andrew, a good friend of mine, told me after reading the stories on the blog found himself waiting in line for a high school sports dinner. People he knew were up front offered him a spot but he felt uncomfortable cutting. As he waited he was quick to take out his phone but decided better to try to enjoy the moment. He quickly found himself in dialogue with a gentleman in front of him which carried on until the line disappeared. As they departed they shared their contentment and wished each other well. “The craziest thing is I don’t even know his name or his child’s name. We had a wonderful conversation about life. This was so unlike me to open up to a stranger but it felt so right. I am so glad I chose not to go on my phone.” Maybe those moments to connect will help us realize the goodness in people and how much we really do have in common with tho...

Angel and Crystal met online three years ago and have been married for one year. “We just love working together. Either she came and worked with me or we found work together.” They joked with each other but their sincerity was genuine as they told me that they would be at both of their families for Christmas. I believe one must constantly reflect on what it means to stay grounded and positive and decide if what they are doing and who they are with is helping to bring them the energy they seek.  These two people found each and their Joy is palpable.  Another couple I had this morning were working together. They had just moved from New Haven to the Bronx. “I thought I would help her with shopping this morning. Usually, she drives me to work for my 4:30 am shift but I am off today.” She smiled and told me her day is just starting at 7:00 am and she will usually work until 10:00 pm. “We met when I was working at a laundromat and we just started talking. Kind, hard working ...

Beautiful woman snuggled in a matching sweater and scarf tells me the importance of taking advantage of every moment. “I am just so grateful. You know you should be your own North Star and direct your life. They say those are the people who live longer.” I believe that this fun, upbeat woman who is shopping at 6:30 in the morning could teach me some tricks about will power and energy. She told me that she taught herself to be this way and makes sure those around her have similar vibes. Thursday, December 12, 2024- A more senior lady in black wide rimmed glasses and a shiny puffer coat told me of her excitement for the holidays. “Now I live in an apartment but when I had a house I loved to host for the holidays. I am excited to be with my family. My daughter-in-law is hosting. We are truly blessed to all be living in the same area. I used to be a social worker but my true joy is family.” Comfort in what we know

Today my general manager called me into his office. He let me know he received my proposal and has been thinking a lot about it and the logistics to implement it. The store prides itself on being one of the best 100 places to work for  the last 27 consecutive years and a place where shoppers can expect warm exchanges with employees.  With well over 100 people working at any given shift, the general manager's desire to take time from what he was doing and reflect on a topic of kindness and compassion is a win. Good for him and good for us as a humanity that there are people out there who are making the decisions and still recognizing the importance of the person beyond the money. Maybe all we can do is to put an idea out to the Universe and have It decide the path to be taken. Note: On January 20th, 2025 I received a written note from the Senior Vice President of HR thanking me for the idea of a gratitude line. He stated that the senior team had discussed an idea similar to ...

Blanca told me “I am in no rush to put up a tree. I always visit my sisters. I have four sisters and we are extremely close. We talk at least once a month. I can tell them anything. Unfortunately, we do not live very close to each other” She goes on to tell me about what a wonderful mother she had. “She died 12 years ago and taught us all about love and kindness.” As she leaves, she tells me how she always hated her name and would love to have changed it. I said, “doesn't it mean white? Whenever I see you I will think of white light…the light within.” How wonderful her response was as she held her hand to her heart. “I really never thought about it that way.  I really like that...white, light...like my mom.  I love that.” She is going to be my signpost. Whenever I see her I will remember my Light within. Our Light is Always there.  We just need to get rid of "the stuff" to turn up the dimmer.

Gabrielle who has a radiating smile, bright red lipstick and tightly woven braided hair teaches me about whispers from God. “You never know who you are going to come across, your smile may change someone’s life. My uncle committed suicide. Would if someone was there to give him a smile to help him through that day?” Gabrielle tells me about sharing her joy when colleagues begin complaining. “We are not guaranteed we will be here tomorrow or even this afternoon so we must be thankful for every moment.” “I always go to self checkout but God told me to go to your line.” I asked how she hears God’s whispers. “He speaks to me through a type of feeling I have in my heart. If I don’t listen, life becomes resistant or difficult.” Interesting that this is the first time I have ever heard God from the people I am coming in contact with. Many use the word energy to refer to how we are connected or energy to highlight an emotion. I believe the words are not what matters, but it is our intentions t...

A tall, vibrant gentleman with a welcoming smile tells me his joy this weekend was seeing his son run track in his first year in college. “The race was no longer than four minutes but we were so proud. My son was so unsure because all of his friends were going to these big name schools. My wife and I believed that it was more important for him to get the social and academic support than the name of the school. Now someone meets with him for four hours every week to help him with strategies to study and organize his week.   Most importantly, my son is happy and in an atmosphere where he can thrive being himself.”  He tells me he has two other kids and “the real importance is being with them. I know if I can step back and watch them grow, then I can truly enjoy who they have become.” As he leaves, and we wish each other well, the cashier next to me said he sees that gentleman and his family at school events; “they are the nicest people.” What a wonderful treat to meet someo...

A boy about the age of ten hangs on the side of the cart as his mother puts groceries on the conveyor belt. He is eager to speak, especially after I offered him a sticker and asked him what makes him happy. He told me about trampoline jumping and doing a special front flip which he went on to show me the movements required. Then he talked about games on his computer. “I love playing because you can pause at any point, lift up your head and jump out of that world and come into this world.” His mother smiles but says nothing, the boy is in his moment truly enjoying being acknowledged. Interesting, unlike most adults, the boy is aware of the identities one plays in different scenarios.  Playing a game on his phone is no different than playing a game without the phone. As adults want their kids off their phones and computers because they are not connecting or being "Present," how many adults are so caught up in the “things” in their own life that they forget to “lift up their hea...

 I feel the interactions with the people I have had at the grocery store should not go in vain.  I think it is very clear that people are trying to make connections and this calling should be recognized. Today, I wrote to my general manager and the head of human resources that their grocery store is being visited by many people who are looking for more than food; they want to be acknowledged.   I suggested a Gratitude Line where people can go to check-out items without being rushed through.  People would recognize that they might need to stand in line for a little longer but this would also provide them with the opportunity to connect with other people in line. In my proposal, I included several interactions from this blog. Sometimes we must wait and be patient that the Universe will guide us on a course to be traveled. The Waiting.  The Trusting.  The living in Faith.

“I remember you.” A bigger gentleman in his 50’s with a strong demeanor and physical strength reminds me of our past encounter. I tell him I remember him with his son. He smiles and you feel his pride, his warmth. “Yes, whenever I get the opportunity to be with him regardless of what we are doing I take it. He needed food, so grocery shopping it was. I used to be a police officer and now I am semi-retired. I help my friend who is a plumber and I have owned a restaurant and a landscaping business.” We talk about how short life is and the importance of being with our kids. He kind of beamed when talking about his son almost in a jolly way.  "You know none of this is really about us.  When we realize that then nothing becomes personal." He left, shaking my hand and formally introducing himself. A good person who seems to have his priorities in order. Beauty all around us

Thanksgiving rush seems to have ended. There is a sluggishness with people who tell me they had a wonderful Thanksgiving but are exhausted. You can feel the lack of energy, including myself. My therapist says with social media it is hard because everyone is comparing their accomplishments with everyone else. She tells me “I thought my Thanksgiving table looked wonderful but then I looked at other people’s spreads. I mean how do they even fit the food on those tables?” One woman was patient to talk and said “I am having a hard time finding where my joy is in life.” I asked her about nature and family and any activities. She agreed that she must start treating herself more. “Shopping brings me Joy.” She said she will make sure to buy that pack of gum or coffee for herself. I am going to make sure to look out for her. We all need a little nourishment in our life.

A man well over 6 feet and a somewhat muscular body with a hat spelling TRUMP rolled up to my line in a motorized wheelchair. He shared with me what a wonderful day it is. “It is just spectacular. Every day is that way. I wake up so happy to be alive.” As he was leaving he told me 6 months ago the doctors gave him 5 months to live. Tuesday, November 26, 2024-A woman in her 50’s with a somber air, serious expression and a cutting voice rushed to begin bagging as I scanned her food. From her energy I respect her space. “You know I had a death in the family yesterday.” As she talks you can feel the weight of her shoulders drop. Oh how my heart crumbled for her. How I admire her strength, humility and acceptance at that moment. As she leaves, all I could summon was that I would be thinking of her. Nature can teach us about the fleeting of moments...this too shall pass

Three women approach. With the taller one clearly beaming with shiny skin and a glamorous grin. She was more than happy to tell me that it was her birthday today. “I have always been a happy person. I mean what is your choice? I surround myself with positive people.” Monday, November 25, 2024-Thirty bags of flour, fifteen bags of confectioners sugar “And 12 donuts. I picked them out individually. You know I make cookies for a living at my house. I make them with love…ever since COVID. It really is a wonderful thing to be my own boss. Ask my husband. I am always happy. We have been married 35 years.” Gentleman in the background confirms, nodding his head.  She goes on to open pictures on her phone and show me the pictures of cookies with intricate designs. The next woman in line is invited to look as well. We are given business cards and told to call whenever we have a need. We All have a purpose; find it and nourish it

"Wow you look really happy” Startled, kindly woman with a beautiful smile and the warmest, dark eyes. She graciously clutches her chest, “that's the kindest thing!” She tells me that is the same way she feels about me. I tell her about her eyes and smile and ask about what brings her Joy. Like many others I speak with, this changes her demeanor. She softened and shared. Before she left she asked for a hug. It was a genuine, warm embrace the one you save for a favorite aunt or uncle…A special connection We are never alone on this journey of life

A kind gentleman with a quiet reserved partner…Asking about their weekend. The woman quickly jumps into the conversation when I ask about their joy. She tells me she cooks. “I make sourdough bread and sell it. I also make zucchini bread. All natural ingredients…it is really easy.” And then she adds “This is not really what I do. I am a banker.” They shared their love of the smells in the house when she cooks. When asked about banking she said she has been doing it for many years and enjoys the work. Finding our balance… Beginning to have recurring customers. I do tend to forget conversations since I interact with so many. After the weekend I ask about if they did anything special. Most Instacart people say they work all weekend but one gentleman in his 40’s said he did have some fun. “I took my father out to the movies and then we had dinner. I really enjoy those times. With my kids I don’t often get to see my dad.” "This weekend was tough. I got into a car accide...

Thanksgiving approaching, one can feel the intensity or the energy change. It is a lot more raw. People seem restless. Sunday, November 17, 2024-The singer. A full bodied beautiful woman caked with a foundation of make-up; Egyptian eye mascara and black cluttered eye lashes. All in black, with fur trim coat and sparkly heels. She puts her cat food cans on the conveyor “You know my apartment complex would charge me $60 a month to have a cat. I needed a doctor’s note to say my cat was for emotional support.” She goes on to tell me she is a singer who has a group of ten musicians and they just came back from a gig. “I enjoy making people happy. People are so appreciative, especially after a show. The best place are the retirement homes. They like the old big band 30’s and 40’s music.” She goes on to tell me she enjoys singing all genres of music and this is her therapy. Her husband died unexpectedly in 2017 of leukemia. Since then she had to move out of the house because of ...

Many people seem to stare in wonder when I tell them I am having a wonderful day because of all the great people I am meeting. They seem almost skeptical as one man responds “most people are good.” I think everyone is doing their best. At one point, I am sure that I have been like every person who has come in my line. I have been the anxious line changer hoping to find the quickest line. And then using my special glare technique try to Will the cashier to go faster.   I have also been a relaxed listener who enjoys companionship even if waiting on line means waiting for someone counting to get the exact change in coins.   I have also been the shopper who just wants to just get the shopping over with. I do think there are a lot of people who are tired. Some people have strategies that may be working now to keep them positive but they are very clear that this was derived from a hard time in their life. One gentleman told me he just got out of jail for four and a h...